Conflict happens because of thoughts. Sounds obvious, right? Of course it is. Both people have thoughts, opinions, ideas. These concepts lead to actions. And sometimes the actions of two people are in conflict.

What's the most helpful type of question in conflict resolution? The open-ended type.

It is really hard to apologize well, to gather your thoughts, become humble, show genuine remorse and to communicate your 'I'm sorry' effectively.

We've been taught to think of most things in terms of the binary: Right • Wrong, Wonderful • Despicable, Angelic • Devilish, Acceptable • Unacceptable. Oftentimes, our instinct is to choose a binary side -- calling something good or bad: 'beets are SO good!' or 'no way, I CAN'T STAND collared shirts.' 

We tend to treat people and problems as one and the same. It is easy to conflate challenging conflicts and people. But, strong conflict resolvers know that this is a mistake.