Rain has been around a lot longer than humans. Sun, too. As long as our species has existed there has been weather, and people have found lots of different ways to handle it.
It’s rough out there. Wars, atrocities, mass shootings, global warming, toxic polarization, free-floating anger and anxiety. As I talk to people around me, I find many are distracted and off-center.
The misunderstandings, assumptions and judgments between generations cause some real conflicts. It is natural for people to believe the way they were raised, the time they grew up and the standards they considered as the norm are superior to other generations’ ways of being. Just like my grandmother and her hand-cranked dryer, it is hard to adopt to new ways.
When my grandmother handed me the wet clothes and told me to “put them through the wringer,” I had no idea what to do. “Go ahead, don’t dawdle. Get those clothes done.”
Here's the thing about employing the shame/blame dynamic duo. They don't solve the conflict. They don't analyze the problem. They don't help us to learn from our mistakes. They don't build trust. They will harm an organization in short order. They do nothing but make folks feel miserable and will crash any relationship.
Trust
What does all this have to do with conflict? Trust. In our relationships with others we are always either making deposits into or subtracting from the reservoir of trust. We humans aren't so different from our canine cousins in that regard. My months with Ohmi had contributed drop by drop to the trust reservoir. Yet one incident when I raised my voice and inadvertently harmed her, slight though it was, had taken us many steps backward.
In the last six months and through the magic of teleconferencing, I've spent about 100 hours engaged in workshops, support networks, advanced practice seminars, and professional discussions with representatives from six continents. Here's a little travelogue; I hope you will indulge me as I present a virtual slide show.
Celebrating light is the theme for November and December holidays across the world. The Hindu festival of Divali was celebrated last week with the lighting of candles to wish one another good luck, riches, and generosity. As the waning light of the sun in the Northeast US is heading us toward the shortest day of the year, many light candles and install lighting displays to brighten our lives and the lives of those around us.
