Mediation Musings
Sitka Creations
Mediation Musings: Optimism

It’s rough out there. Wars, atrocities, mass shootings, global warming, toxic polarization, free-floating anger and anxiety. As I talk to people around me, I find many are distracted and off-center.

Mediation Musings: Optimism
Mediation Musings
Sitka Creations
Mediation Musings: Weaving Generations

The misunderstandings, assumptions and judgments between generations cause some real conflicts. It is natural for people to believe the way they were raised, the time they grew up and the standards they considered as the norm are superior to other generations’ ways of being. Just like my grandmother and her hand-cranked dryer, it is hard to adopt to new ways.

Mediation Musings: Weaving Generations
Mediation Musings
Sitka Creations
Mediation Musings: Generations

When my grandmother handed me the wet clothes and told me to “put them through the wringer,” I had no idea what to do. “Go ahead, don’t dawdle. Get those clothes done.”

Mediation Musings: Generations
Mediation Musings
Sitka Creations
Mediation Musings: Ideas

This month I ask you to get out your reading glasses and absorb some new ideas from various authors. I’d like to introduce you to writers who are expanding knowledge in the field of conflict resolution and connected topics. Happy reading!

Mediation Musings: Ideas
40 Tips
Tamar Russell
40 Days of Resolution at Home | Day 1: What is ...

When people think about conflict, they usually think negatively. Our work is about moving conflict concepts away from the lose-lose mentality to a win-win one, where conflict becomes...

40 Days of Resolution at Home | Day 1: What is Conflict?

Community Mediation

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December Mediation Musings

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MVMP is part of a network of Massachusetts Community mediation programs--MOPC Massachusetts Office of Public Collaboration.

Our Program Director wrote the following:

Hi everyone,

It has become something of a tradition now for me to send out a note of thanks to mark this peculiarly American and wonderful holiday of Thanksgiving. I am thinking particularly about things to be grateful for and the importance of valuing those around you.

So with that in mind I want to acknowledge an amazing year of progress and transition for many and also the extreme amount of hard work put in to manage these changes.  For those interested in such things:

·       3330 mediations 72.68% of which reached agreement

·       Outreach carried out to 19,310 at 449 outreach events

·       35 basic mediation trainings and 219 specialized trainings

·       93% of participants happy with the process and 90% would recommend to someone else

·       Nearly 50% of participants reporting thought that mediation had built their skills, improved communication and reduced conflict/stress

·       3 new centers were brought into the re-entry program

·       A new Probate and Family Court pilot was begun

·       We conducted a successful conference with the Trial Court

·       Many were trained in conflict coaching and are now offering services

I could go on and on, but for those less interested in numbers and more interested in the feeling the work generates, you can know that everything that was achieved was done in collaboration and friendship. 

While you are sitting with your turkey, nut roast or protesting against the holiday as a colonialist relic, I hope you are not thinking about work.  However you can bask in some of the successes of the past year and be grateful for your role as peacemakers.  Thank you so much for everything you do.

Yours in solidarity

Ros

Rosalind Cresswell,

Program Manager, MOPC

 

Mediation Musings: Every Day is Conflict Resolution Day

by, Sara Barnes, President and Lead Mediator

October 17, 2019 is a worldwide celebration of Conflict Resolution Day. In Massachusetts the legislature has declared the week of October 14-18 Conflict Resolution Week.

Every day is conflict resolution day at Martha’s Vineyard Mediation Program. Here are a few happenings from last week.

  • Working on the Youth Mediation Program—creating partnerships with a youth organization so our mediators have a confidential setting for mediation services.

  • Answering inquiries from numerous individuals and organizations who are seeking mediation, facilitation or conflict coaching services.

  • Interacting with various divorcing couples and our in-house lawyer who prepares the court packets, in order to finalize divorce documents.

  • Workplace conflict session #2 with a cohort of supervisors and managers who are working their way through a published conflict management text.

  • Preparation of our quarterly reports to the offices of the Attorney General, District Court, Probate/Family Court and Massachusetts Office of Public Collaboration.

  • Discussion with a sister mediation organization in order to consider a partnership on a complicated project.

  • Preparation for the twice-yearly Introduction to Mediation course fielding inquiries and preparing materials.

  • Drop by from a friend of the organization who was thinking about getting involved in MVMP.

  • Meeting of the Conflict Coaches to develop their campaign to promote this free service for Martha’s Vineyard residents.

Sometimes we feel like we are in a tiny boat paddling hard against prevailing winds that push in the opposite direction. Your support and belief in our mission—to encourage and assist all residents of Dukes County to resolve conflicts through mediation and other constructive dispute resolution tools—keeps us afloat.

On October 17 we will celebrate Conflict Resolution Day, joining with thousands across the globe who take one day to lift up the notions that conflict resolution is the way forward toward peace and understanding. Add this one on to your list of holidays. Celebrate with MVMP.

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October Mediation Musings

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Conflict Resolution Day: Every Day at MVMP

 Sara Barnes,

President and Lead Mediator

October 17, 2019 is a worldwide celebration of Conflict Resolution Day. In Massachusetts the legislature has declared the week of October 14-18 Conflict Resolution Week.

Everyday is conflict resolution day at Martha’s Vineyard Mediation Program. Here are a few happenings from last week. 

·       Working on the Youth Mediation Program—creating partnerships with a youth organization so our mediators have a confidential setting for mediation services.

·       Answering inquiries from numerous individuals and organizations who are seeking mediation, facilitation or conflict coaching services.

·       Interacting with various divorcing couples and our in-house lawyer who prepares the court packets, in order to finalize divorce documents.

·       Workplace conflict session #2 with a cohort of supervisors and managers who are working their way through a published conflict management text.

·       Preparation of our quarterly reports to the offices of the Attorney General, District Court, Probate/Family Court and Massachusetts Office of Public Collaboration.

·       Discussion with a sister mediation organization in order to consider a partnership on a complicated project.

·       Preparation for the twice-yearly Introduction to Mediation course fielding inquiries and preparing materials.

·       Drop by from a friend of the organization who was thinking about getting involved in MVMP.

·       Meeting of the Conflict Coaches to develop their campaign to promote this free service for Martha’s Vineyard residents.

Sometimes we feel like we are in a tiny boat paddling hard against prevailing winds that push in the opposite direction. Your support and belief in our mission—to encourage and assist all residents of Dukes County to resolve conflicts through mediation and other constructive dispute resolution tools—keeps us afloat.  

On October 17 we will celebrate Conflict Resolution Day, joining with thousands across the globe who take one day to lift up the notions that conflict resolution is the way forward toward peace and understanding. Add this one on to your list of holidays. Celebrate with MVMP.

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September Mediation Musings

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At least one, if not all of our principles: Confidentiality, Voluntariness, Neutrality and Self-Determination; function as guide stars for each service we offer. It's good to have principles to hold on to when we do mediation, facilitation, conflict coaching or educational work. These principles unite our organization and provide us with shared core values.

Communicate Carefully might well be considered another one of our principles because we know that successful practitioners in the conflict resolution field are precise and thoughtful in their communication. Choosing the right word or phrase, listening carefully, matching cadence and tone, being aware of how messages can be put in a more effective way, studying language and usage-- all are ways we can become more expert communicators. I found this article to be a great read in this regard. I hope you enjoy it and learn from it as I have. 

Will we see you at one of our many upcoming activities? Workplace conflict is a big focus for the coming months. The Youth Project continues with two videos being edited and mediation services for youth now available with our newly trained Youth Mediators. The Introduction to Mediation course begins on October 3. We are, as usual, providing conflict resolution services to individuals and organizations as we continue to serve our community. We are scheduling into November and December now because we are so busy!

Thanks for your great support for our work.

Sara Barnes, President MVMP

Testimonials

“I was terrified when I came into the court. It seemed like the end of the world. Thanks to my compassionate and understanding mediators, I was able to have a productive conversation with someone I considered an adversary. I couldn’t believe we were able to work it out without going in front of a judge. Thank you MVMP.”

– Small Claims Client

“I was really not looking forward to mediation. But it turned turned out to be relatively pleasant. I really enjoyed working with the two of you. I plan to recommend mediation to others.”

– Divorce Client

“You brought us all together. It was awesome. I am so relieved. All our people felt uplifted, more united and part of a team. In particular one Board member said she felt she was taken care of with kindness and wisdom. We all know each other much better, have defined our work together and are in such better shape than we were when we started. Thank you MVMP.”

– Facilitation Client

“If you have the chance to do Conflict Coaching, DO IT! It was eye opening for me. My coach was kind, insightful and such a great listener. Most importantly, I learned so much about myself and about how I handle conflict. I now have a good, solid conflict management plan for the future.”

– Conflict Coaching Client

“It was valuable to help me handle a current conflict in my workplace. Putting a positive spin on conflict was an eye-opener for me. It gives me a structure to address problems. We had a very serious conflict at work recently so this is very important and relevant to me right now.”

– Workplace Conflict Management Services