My son was two and playing on the sidewalk with the other kids. Laura, the next-door neighbor, jiggled her one-year-old. “I think for the first time in over two years,” I said, “I might not be overwhelmingly tired.” She replied, “I’m hoping to have that feeling soon, I’m just so exhausted!” As I recall early parenthood, I can still today feel the memory in my body and mind and spirit stretched so thinly, so precariously surviving, yearning for something out of reach.
Rain has been around a lot longer than humans. Sun, too. As long as our species has existed there has been weather, and people have found lots of different ways to handle it.
It’s rough out there. Wars, atrocities, mass shootings, global warming, toxic polarization, free-floating anger and anxiety. As I talk to people around me, I find many are distracted and off-center.
The misunderstandings, assumptions and judgments between generations cause some real conflicts. It is natural for people to believe the way they were raised, the time they grew up and the standards they considered as the norm are superior to other generations’ ways of being. Just like my grandmother and her hand-cranked dryer, it is hard to adopt to new ways.
MV Mediation and other community mediation centers offer the service of facilitating meetings for various organizations and groups. As neutral facilitators, our service providers can take charge, make sure there is balanced participation, and help the group to be clear about agenda items, decisions and future action items.
A number of years ago a friend was having difficulties with her son. I thought that watching the kind and firm dog trainer on TV might help her to learn how to stay more consistent and clear with her son. A few weeks later she had recorded a number of episodes, and her son asked her, “Are we getting a dog?”
“I was terrified when I came into the court. It seemed like the end of the world. Thanks to my compassionate and understanding mediators, I was able to have a productive conversation with someone I considered an adversary. I couldn’t believe we were able to work it out without going in front of a judge. Thank you, MVMP.”
Conflict and dispute resolution is a difficult process for folks to wrap their heads around. As mediators and other conflict resolution service providers seek help participants, they find themselves drawing upon various types of figurative and symbolic language. As Tammy Lenski, conflict resolution researcher and practitioner, writes: “The way we frame a problem has a powerful impact on the solutions we can see . . . metaphor(s) orients us differently to a conflict and influences how we think, act, and resolve it.”
